Dressed to Kill

I have to start dressing like a serial killer. Wait! No. Let me rephrase that: I have to learn how to dress like a serial killer...

Hmmm...wait. No. That still sounds wrong somehow. Perhaps I should explain first.

I'm going to be portraying a serial killer in a short, independent film in the near future. It's not a big production. My best friend is making a movie for his film class. I'm not much of an actor but I'm told my character has little to no dialogue so it shouldn't prove too difficult. That is, of course, unless it's like the last time I volunteered for one of these short films. I portrayed an exceptionally gruesome zombie. (If I do say so myself.) Unfortunately, the only gruesome thing about me was the makeup work (I did it myself.) and the scars inflicted from the stunts. (Also did that myself.) Nevertheless, it all worked out in the end.

This time around, however, given that the budget for the film is nonexistent, I have to provide my own wardrobe. Therein lies the dilemma. I will be wearing a mask but as the old saying goes, "clothes make the man." (I don't know if that's how the old saying goes, mind you. That's just how I remember it.) What is considered fashionable for a serial killer nowadays? I've spoken to the director and he says I have carte-blanche on my attire which is fantastic given that I don't know what the FUCK I should wear to make me look "serial-killer-y," so to speak. I was going to go with jeans and a T-Shirt but I don't find that eerie enough. Maybe I should dress in a weird casual business shirt and a bow tie. You know, that substitute math teacher look. Perhaps a janitor's uniform? (Wow! This is tougher than I thought it.) I'm trying to channel all of the horror movies I've seen and all of the suspense novels I've read but I can't think of something truly horrifying outside of a cop, a clown or a nun outfit and that would change the whole premise of the movie, I should think. Hopefully, I'll find something when I make a trip to Salvation Army. There's always some crazy threads being sold there. No pun intended.

Aside from all that...DUDE! I get to play a serial killer in a movie! I'm stoked! Gotta enjoy the little things in life, right?